I Lack A Title.

Rona and I were sitting alone at a big round table for dinner Friday night. I was picking at my salad, very depressed. I asked her for the time and she said it was fifteen minutes until 6, when her cab would arrive to take her to the train station so she could go back home. It struck me then and there that I should stop moping around and just go home. With renewed vigor I pushed my food aside, stood up and said excitedly, “I’ll go with you. I’m going home.” Rona gaped amazed in my direction, “That’s really spontaneous.” We took the elevator to the ninth floor so I could do a quick 10-minute pack and I just smiled, “I know. That’s how I live my life.” Of course the latter isn’t always true, but as often as possible I make fun haste decisions (I’ve got stories!).

I packed all I needed and we went downstairs, only to find that it was raining. Everything felt right and I was happy to be going home. I called my Auntie Meme to pick me up at the train station and I was all set. Three hours later, I’m standing at Union Station in Downtown LA. Never have I been more glad to see the welcoming sight of skyscrapers. Within seconds my twin aunts were there. Rather than bother my mother I slept over at Meme’s.

[Starting here I lose all literary quality for speedier retelling purposes] The next day was fun. Noah’s Bagels for breakfast. Lots of ocha (green tea) at Auntie Maggie’s. Lollicup (milktea boba). One of my fave foods for dinner (white rice, ground beef w/ potatoes & vegetables). Played with Midori-chan. At night I went to mom’s house. Elizabeth wanted to hang out so she drove over to my mom’s. I met her lover-man, Gabriel. He’s funny&nice! I attempted to ride a skateboard, but I sux. Favio came over and it was a nice surprise to see him. We all sat outside in the back chatting. Watched Law and Order: SVU. Went back to Meme’s. She played an “Evening Piano” CD as we slept. I had nightmares.

Today: Meme woke up early and cooked spaghetti for breakfast. Wow, random right? I love it~! Then went to Auntie Maggie’s. Brian, Maggie, Meme, Midori-chan, and I got into Meme’s car and they drove me back to UCSB. I have to say UCSB has lost all its initial magic. For a million and one reasons.  I’m having dinner with Toby later tonight! I miss Toby – she’s the best.

And it’s obvious that I’m dying.

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Never Take Friendship Personal

The first thing that comes to mind is that I have not yet upgraded to WordPress 2.3, but this is just a nagging thought. Other thoughts:

I have lost the ability to speak. I have lost the ability to think. I have lost the ability to take some time out of my day to simply sit down and write. I have lost the ability to feel. I have lost the ability to be significant. I have long since lost the ability to cry. I have lost the ability to love. I have lost the ability to trust. I have lost the ability to keep friendships. I have lost the ability to care (about myself).

Quite honestly, sleep is most tempting. And yet, there’s too much sound. There are too many people. Life is so hectic. It just never stops. Why can’t, for one moment, time cease? My breathing can stop and in a quick instant I would no longer have to be alive. This could be passed off as stress or exhaustion, though it isn’t.

Apathy takes its toll. And I just don’t care.

P.S. Pita chips are the shit.

Now playing: Shania Twain – You’re Still The One
via FoxyTunes

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Don’t Get Emo

Or so says the Vans sticker on my monitor. Random fact. And anyway, I’ve never worn Vans, but I remember getting the sticker last summer at Warped Tour.

Recently, I’ve had to restore my iPhone at least 4 times… not very fun lemme tell you. But whatever, I’ll likely be exchanging it this weekend. It’s terrible, really. I hate the iPhone and always will. Even the updates do more harm than good to the cell. *shrugs*


I’ve no wish to be melodramatic so I’m just going to say this like it’s no big deal and it doesn’t bother me: in the span of two weeks I’ve lost five friends. Paula, David, Sandy, Hailey,  Ryan. I’ll pretend like I don’t give a shit.

So, school has been keeping me busy lately. Very busy. And tired. But I can’t pretend like I’m NOT having fun, because I am. (:  My schedule is as follows:


Pretty full, ey? 20 units… 0: but only because Chinese and Japanese are 5 units each. Actually, Chen lǎo shī doesn’t teach all that well – very disorganized and eh… ): And as for my math professor, it’s his first time teaching and HE sucks really badly. Other than that classes are aites.

Hm, I don’t really feel like writing or saying anything, so meh.

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