I Need Caffeine

Desperately in need of some caffeine, or I could just go to sleep. I am incredibly tired, even after taking a four-hour long nap earlier today. Ugh, and I have my linguistics final tomorrow… but at least it’s in the afternoon. In the morning I’m definitely going to have to pack up all my shit. Packing/unpacking is a never-ending routine, and I hate it.

Shoutout: I love Victorialee<3

Note to self: Don’t let it affect you. Walk it off, walk it off! Just like everybody else, it fades. There is no reason to ever get upset. No reason whatsoever.

I want to stop taking my pills. Truthfully and honestly, I really miss being depressed. I cannot stand normalcy; it’s disgusting. Last night I told Rona she should be happy that she’s… well, happy. You know, it’s the normal/healthy thing… but I did warn her that I’m master hypocrite so she can take my words for what they are or for what I really mean. Not being depressed means not being able to think. Mindless happy people are stupid.

I’m sure there are a million thoughts I could write down, but none are coming to mind. I just can’t think anymore. Underneath it all I still hate myself and the world and I am not really reallllyyy happy, at all. Pills feel like suppression. They’re just disabling my ability to think negatively; I’m trapped. This, I can’t walk off. Arghhh.

I miss playing DDR.

Now playing: Madonna – Like a Prayer
via FoxyTunes

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