DayMarch 15, 2009

A Quick Evaluation of Self

“Don’t you miss me?”
“What’s there to miss?”

“Can we go to Griffith Park like the good ol’ days? Just ‘cus I’m 20 doesn’t mean I can’t be like in the good ol’ days.”
“No, you can come over. But you can’t ask for things. But you can come visit.”

I’m wondering where I went horribly wrong. She called me to ask me how I’m doing with money and if I would like for her to transfer some money to my account. But then I told her I’m not going home because no one ever comes to visit me (since the reason she called was asking why I hadn’t been over in a while). Even my aunt, she called me yesterday to see how I was doing. And she said she misses me, so I told her that if she does she could come visit me. She said no.

This is going to be a year-long grudge. I’ll call them all on their birthdays (except Elvia) to wish them happy birthdays, but I’m not going over to celebrate with them. They didn’t come here to celebrate with me. And George didn’t call me until 7pm. So… whatever. He’ll get a very late phone call from me on his birthday. Year-long grudge. And my grudges usually don’t even last a day.

Her rude remarks followed by my swift goodbyes and then she tells me she loves me, repeatedly. At this moment in time, I don’t love you. You’re such a bitch! Ugh. I’m typing… and I’m getting over it as we speak.

There are two separate topics in this entry, I just realized.

I’m not going home for spring break. I have plenty to do here. So much reading, writing, etccccc. It’s all good. Ugh. I’m okay with her just giving me some money here and there. That’s an okay relationship. It works.

Ugh, geez… I hope there are some YouTube videos to watch to help me lighten up my mood. (: And after all I am going on my super amazing shopping spree come Friday!!! So it is super okay. ^_^

Edit: You know, I was at a park today and I thought of my mom. It made me want to spend time with her. It made me miss my family. I can only take so much negativity. I seriously don’t know where I went wrong.