MonthApril 2009

A Late Night Smoke

I’m waiting for my hair to dry.
I’m sitting calmly on my couch, laptop in front, smoking a clove.
Time isn’t my friend as of late, though you can tell from the time difference between entries.
Revolutionary Road gave me the urge to smoke, to be honest.
I think I’m falling into a state of apathy and confusing it for happiness.
Any time I’m not sad is a good time.
I haven’t been sad in a year!

There’s cause for celebration.

My judgment as of late has been typical.
And by that I mean typical college student.
In other words, my personal judgment is off.
There’s just been a lot of growing up this past year. I’m OK with that.

Somewhere along the way I decided to care too much about myself that I stopped caring about others.
There’s no remedy because I don’t care.

But I’ve probably not been this stable since 9th grade.
I remember I used to idolize my 9th grade self. The day I stopped was the day I learned to accept myself. I think I was riding my bike when it happened.

Teasing isn’t for the faint of heart.
It took me about an hour to wash/deep condition/comb out the tangles.
The stylish faux hawk made it all worth it though.

Swim class ought to be fun in the morning, if I manage to wake up.
Oversleeping is really annoying.
Sleeping in general is a waste of my time.
YET… I’ve been sleeping about 11 hours a night, average.
I can’t let that happen because swim is at 9 am.

My thoughts are pretty fragmented at the moment.
But I figured getting a little blog on was better than nothing.

Sleep a little. Dream a lot.

Resistance

Spring quarter is beautiful.

My classes:

  • Swimming
  • Continental Philosophy
  • Philosophy of Freedom/Determinism
  • Advanced Philosophy of Mind
  • Psychopathology

I login only to update my plugins because it irks me when it says something like 7 plugins need updates. Sometimes I’ll feel like blogging, but usually I’m so far away from my computer the words and thoughts aren’t captured. They’re only relevant for so long.

Being 20 is the best thing ever. Last night I made an apple pie. Friends and I decided to get high a few times (lmao omfg let’s not discuss). I love the sun. I have new hobbies. Life is wonderful. Living in a beach town is refreshing.

There is so much to appreciate. (:

I’ll try to keep this updated, at least for my sake.