‘Till I Collapse

‘Cause sometimes you just feel tired,
Feel weak, and when you feel weak, you feel like you wanna just give up.
But you gotta search within you, you gotta find that inner strength
And just pull that shit out of you and get that motivation to not give up
And not be a quitter, no matter how bad you wanna just fall flat on your face and collapse.

– Eminem (i think…)

Nothing like a little THUG LYFE lyrix to get me going.

Yesterday night I ran 5.3 miles. Towards the tail end I mostly just felt like curling up into a ball and crying because my emotional stability was definitely questionable. I supplement physical hardship for the emotional pain I feel but try to push into the deepest possible recesses of my mind.

Before I venture into what’s causing me emotional duress (if I venture there at all) I’d like to describe my current running technique.

  •  Run at 6 mph for 2 miles – 20 minutes on the dot. (Speed: 10:00 min miles)
  • Walk at 3 mph for .25  miles – 5 minutes
  • Run at 6 mph for 1 mile – 10 minutes
  • Walk at 3 mph for .25 miles – 5 minutes
  • Run at 6 mph for .8 miles – 8 minutes
  • Walk at 3 mph for .25 miles – 5 minutes
  • Run at 6 mph for .55 miles – 5.5 minutes
  • Walk at 3 mph for .2 miles – 4 minutes

This totals to 62.5 minutes unless my math is broke. If I had the ability to straight run it I would clock in at 52 minutes on the dot. So by my number crunching I’m shorting myself a whole mile if I want to keep my time. But honestly time right now is not my main priority. Increasing and improving my endurance and speed are my main points of concern.

By the time I’ve reached mile 4, I no longer feel my heart race increasing and my sweat decreases… meaning I may be burning fewer calories, but perhaps more fat? What I think I’m going to try next is running FASTER (sprints) for those shorter distances (i.e. faster than 6 mph) to 1) keep the burn going 2) increase my speed and 3) decrease my overall time. I’d say even a week or so ago 5.5 mph was my cap. But changing my running style from slow walk/warm up to jogging from the get-go boosted my speed immediately.

I’m kinda just learning as I go. Not reading any running material because I ain’t got time for that kinda deal.

My favorite part of running is getting to listen to some dope ass hip hop music. I have very few to no thoughts while running. The extent of my thought process is: FASTER, JUST A LITTLE BIT LONGER, or like ALMOST THERE. Which makes it sound… sorta sexual. RAWR. Yeah, one wishes running were that fulfilling. Sadly… no.

exercise

After googling some shit and reading this here… it’s looking like running is not in my cards today. I’mma do some of that TABATA. Or, high intensity interval training basically and this is the first time I’ve heard it called tabata training. Plus some yoga. Yoga has been strengthening my core purdy good. And if I do some arm work, the next day my biceps are more defined. After just one day of yoga! It’s magical.

THE FIX… I like that. It’s recommending longer distances done less frequently. SOOOO like if I can bust out 10k just 3x a week, I’m fucking golden, baby. Then the other 3 days I can do HIIT. Then one day I can fuck around/be like NAH I’mma be lazy. Etc. Because it most definitely happens at least once a week where I’m just like ‘this is not for me today.’

Anyway… I not feel like discussing my emotional woes.

I haven’t even written about my trip to Vegas or what happened last night with BOOK CLUB. But shiiiiiiiiiiiiit book club meeting really rejuvenated my soulllll.

I think this post has served its purpose.

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