DaySeptember 23, 2015

People I Know

While I’ve been a complete hermit and recluse this entire year I do admit I know some people. While I’m not as close to this lovely lady as I wish I were I’m still looking to her as a source of inspiration.


A lot of questions come to mind when looking at this. For starters, why did it take her 5 years to complete  her Bachelor’s degree? Then… it’s like OK she thought she was going to be a teacher and she did teach 2 months short of 5 years. Then boom she’s in law school. To my knowledge teachers don’t earn very much in the beginning. So aside from knowing her family is well-off how did she pay for law school? Where did that decision come about?

Anyway. I feel like her teaching credential is similar to my personal equivalent of this A.A. I’m currently pursuing. I just feel like I need to figure out what my game plan is going to be. I don’t want to waste time/years waiting to spring into action.

But anyway… looking at other peoples’ educational pursuits really inspires me and lets me go, OK this isn’t so weird. You go one way then you just veer left and go in another direction. And it’s still consistent with your overarching life goals.

Regardless I still need to figure out just how long I’m going to work before applying to some type of graduate school program. Certainly though, I’m not going to make any kind of move until I know.

Sigh… but it’s just that these programs require application a year in advance you know… and I need to study for the entrance exams… and ughajdfahsldf stressed.


I’m trying not to go into full-fledged meltdown here. One step at a time  works… but only to the extent that you actually know where you’re going. And I feel like I’m flailing my arms about not knowing where my next step is supposed to be.

In two weeks I go back to school. Period. For the first three months I will be able to work at any full-time job that allows me to take Thursdays off. Which practically eliminates any respectable paying job right off the bat. So I’m stressed definitely. Also I can’t underestimate how many projects or assignments I might have in my classes so working a job with extremely odd hours also somehow stresses me out.

It just seems to me the whole point of going to school is to work and earn happiness (=money) right?

Anyway… I just know now that I want to go to grad school and so it seems really stressful to me asking how long I should work before applying. MBA or JD? That’s another question. There are too many questions and I’m feeling overwhelmed. But I’m not even beyond step 1 yet: Finish this 9 month A.A. in Merch Marketing program.

Then what?

Cue me biting my nails. I don’t like uncertainty.