From Jak & Jil Blog.
Alexander Wang Fall 2010 Ad Campaign
I think I just died a little. Alexander Wang. Abbey Lee Kershaw. All in one. Omg. Sign me up for AW’s Fall Ready-To-Wear… YUMMMMMM!
Press Harder.
Pressing matters at hand. In note-format because it might be too overwhelming to try to explain myself formally.
Circa Survive concert Nov. 6th with Giselle.
New York December 16-22 with Raquel.
Plans to visit Brian in Japan (not so likely, given $)
Plans to visit Jesse in Germany/or travel to Eur somewhere… Here’s to hoping. I have until August of next year to figure out if I can save enough money.
Graduation is approaching in December. And then it’s time to start my life. I have no clue what I’m doing, where I’m going, what I want to do. Today I had an appointment with Career Services and Chris helped me out a little. There’s an assessment test I need to take on the Career Services website … unfortunately I didn’t get an access code to logon – so I’ll have to go BACK tomorrow to get that. Options.
When it comes down to it, I can make a good impression, sell my skillsets; I’m not worried about finding something I’m good at or passionate about because I can be passionate about anything and excel. I just need someone to narrow it down for me because I’m completely open to new ideas and trying out career paths I never knew existed. But what are those available paths?? That’s *my* question. And I need HELP. Time is going by so quickly.
MONEY. I feel so poor right now. It’s like… what can I sell status! Haha.
Jesse and I want to learn French, and write letters to one another. Talk about tough. Uh, I don’t even know how to pronounce most French words – Spanish, German, Japanese – no problem. French requires some kind of oral finesse that I’m not so sure I possess.
One of my life goals is to be well-traveled and speak a few different languages. Travel the world. Make friends all over the world, fly in planes to visit them, speak in their native tongues. A chic lifestyle. Making plans makes me happy. I love having things to look forward to; if I can’t look forward to something I feel restless, like I’m not moving fast enough.
- Bikram Yoga twice a week. Mondays 7am – get my dayweek going! And one other time during the week with Kae.
- Farmer’s market fresh fruit and vegetables.
- I need to start cooking again. It brought me great joy, way to save money, and get healthy again.
There comes a moment when you realize you’ve lost focus and have to start taking care of yourself again.
If I could live a life without needing sleep… I would be the most efficient me. I function, get ideas, feel alive, feel productive at night. That’s when my brain is working its magic. But there is something so very special to me about the creativity of dreams that draws me back to sleep. And sleep comes so easy. I really need to read Beggars in Spain.
Today I went to Borders and Home Depot with Jesse. At Borders we both purchased Let the Right One In. I’m excited to read that… the movie was brilliant and I can only imagine that the novel will be equally impressive. Gore be damned, I’m going to read this. And then Jesse gave me her copy of Boneshaker! I don’t typically read too much Science Fiction but after our class it’s pretty legit stuff. It touches on things I discuss in my Philosophy classes but on a very literary imaginary world sort of level. And I kept meaning to buy plants for my house! But it just never happened. And then today Jesse helped me out by picking some plants for me and I got them. Let’s get a little life and fresh air in this place.
I am in a different place right now, than I used to be. Wine and late night talks. Drives up the mountain to see some late night stars. This independence puts me in the right state of mind. I love feeling like I have changed, matured. The best part is that I can sense the change. A to B. Distance. Time. Mental maturity.
Just driving to the post office to mail a care package for my uncle makes me feel… different. That I’m living on my own, can get into my car, and gift something to someone gives me this feeling. I can’t quite label it. Locking the door every morning, unlocking my car, getting into it, and going somewhere, and then doing it again the next day in different clothing – also gives me that feeling. I am doing things… things associated with… Change, Independence. I don’t know how to explain that feeling. If I were to capture in a video every morning when I walk out and lock the front door in a new outfit everyday, it’s like… a life is being lived. There’s something stable but yet NEW about every day… and I don’t know how to explain it.
My goal is to become an early morning kind of person. I want to have enough time in the morning to take a leisurely shower, make some coffee or tea, read a little, eat breakfast, and then head on out. As it is I’m lucky if I have enough time to grab a slice of bread and take it on the go. Sleep here becomes a barrier for me. I can stay awake doing stuff at night, no problem. But I can also pass out immediately. It’s a gift I’ve been given. The problem that lies herein comes from rising out of my deep and precious sleep. The sheets are so comforting, the warmth so reassuring, the dreams so ethereal. It’s like living two lives. The dream world and the real world. I want to stay as long as possible in either world, but the transition from one to the next is so very difficult for me.
For the longest time I have not had my red Moleskine. I do not know how I lost it, but since then I haven’t had something to carry around with me to take notes. I need something to write things those fleeting thoughts down. My mind is a confection of little thoughts that need to come together as one. There’s so much to think about these days. I need to write more and more frequently.
Goodnight!
Following in my mother’s footsteps
My mother likes to tell stories; she has a really great memory and talks about the past like it were yesterday. One particular story she’s shared a few times explains her passion for shoes. Before she came to America my family lived in Guatemala (that’s in Central America, folks), and so my mother attended elementary and middle school there. One particular day she couldn’t find her pair of shoes, or found only one – something like that. Education is a privilege in these parts and so school was not to be missed; my mother also only owned one pair of shoes back then. So, unable to find her shoes my grandmother made my mother walk to school – without shoes. The streets over there, at least then and in the small village my mom lived, were not paved to the extent streets in America are and in fact are made of rocks. Embarrassed by this moment in her life, my mom jokes that to ensure she is never without shoes again she must continually buy shoes… Haha! While I don’t buy that reason the story remains in my memory always and suddenly I am taking after my mother with my passion for shoes!
In my little heart I have a soft spot for Noir Victorian lace, booties, oxfords, etc., and maybe you can tell a little from some of my current shoe lusts but… NUDE and COGNAC colors are definitely infiltrating my dreams. I noticed a lot of my wardrobe consists of jewel tone colors and I associate that with a child’s wardrobe. NUDE, WHITE, HEATHER GREY, BLUSH PINK – these are all colors I associate with chic women. And so the goal now is to slowly donate, or otherwise gift a lot of the clothes I currently own to make room for a new kind of wardrobe.
If I had all the money in the world I’d get myself some o’ these:
Jeffrey Campbell Charli Platform Clog
Sam Edelman Zoe Wedge Bootie
Aldo Nold Wedge bootie
Aldo Mignogna Wedge Heel
Aldo Narain Oxford High Heel Bootie
Miu Miu White Round-Toe Lattice Pumps
Topshop “Super High Platform” shoe circa 2007 
I’d die to get a hold of these!
Finsk Suede Wedge
Resolution and Smiles
How funny that a simple change in atmosphere makes me so much more at ease. I love this feeling, and for over three months I have not felt such comfort. Yes, I’m feeling an overwhelming amount of appreciation and love and friendship that the people I’m currently hanging out with would probably just laugh at how much I cherish them at this very moment. For THREE months I have not felt any comfort, no desire to talk or socialize.
Not a day goes by that someone doesn’t mention my beautiful white Michael Kors watch. And that makes me feel like my purchase is completely warranted and a total staple item in my wardrobe. I mean, it’s been converted into my everyday watch, that’s for sure. At some point, I’ll need to switch it up though so that this watch doesn’t ever get “old” in my or anyone else’s eyes.
Resolution: Visit Brian in Kyoto, Japan next year. Definitely, this will require a biiig savings… but I can do it! If I resolve to go sometime in early 2011, I think it’s definitely manageable, just before I start looking for jobs and after I graduate. Graduation: December. So this is a realistic goal, I think.
I definitely have another essay to write tonight, this one a 6-pager. The prompt is up to me, which is not the best thing to be honest. I rather have a predetermined question that I can just answer straightaway. Good thing this isn’t due until midnight. I can do it, I just rather get it done sooner than later. And yet, that is why I am here procrastinating… hm.
Whoops… forgot to publish this at 12:30am this morning so now… 11 hours later, it’s published! (: