Apr
27

Day of Sun

What a day! My Sunday began quite strangely. I was working on one of my sites late into the night, being productive! and all that… when I received a wonderful text message from my lovely Steve. The boy does know how to surprise and amaze. To be just a tad more specific it was a love message with an angsty photo of him that had the “I’m missing you” look in his eyes. A love song was attached and played in the background. How very romantic, yes?

Afterward I got on the phone with Elizabeth♥ my best friend and true love of my life. *hugs her* We had been texting, but it definitely was not enough so I suggested she call me and even though she refused at first she did eventually. We talked for nearly two hours, into the early early hours of the morning. I love this girl! She’s an amazing friend, and a gorgeous person inside and out. Most definitely.

And even though I went to bed late… I awoke at 6:30am after only three hours of sleep! What is the deal with that? Awkward sleeping patterns, sadly. I went back to sleep and then woke up at 10am. And while I’m being time-specific, I got a call from Steve at 12:30. *hugs*

Plans later tonight with ze Ronadear & Nefertiti. I’m looking forward to it! (: It feels like I haven’t hung out with Rona for two weeks, and the feeling is right because it’s true.

It’s time to rekindle those three friendships that slowly were starting to wither these past two weeks!

Breathe easy.

Jan
14

Tell Me You Love Me

It’s Monday morning again. A whole week of school has gone by, but I can’t believe just how much happened, and how busy I was. I feel exhausted just knowing what’s to come this week. Two weekend days just are not enough to restore my energy for a whole week of crazy schedules.

Mm, I’m still way sad over the whole lost digi-cam. I don’t know what photos I’m going to use now for 365. Three-ish goals ruined now. I mean, I didn’t take photos with my iPhone every day. Mostly with ze digi-cam. ): Ugh, there are just lots of photos on there that meant so much to me. =\ My motivation is slightly drained; it’s like having to start all over, except now without the digi-cam. It’s slightly awkward to use a DSLR for regular-ish daily pics. *siiiigh* Materialism only serves to increase the depression.

I need to leave in like 20ish minutes for my appointment with Katie. There is still little to no connection between us. To be honest, I think it’s for her lack of trying. Mayhaps she doesn’t like me. I’m torn between continuing to see her just to test her, or simply moving on. I already have an appointment with some other person. Fuck, I’m like constantly needing help. Lmao.

Really, just tell me you love me. =\ I need some sort of support atm asap-status. UGH. What kills me is that I was so happy most of last week. It fades and it goes… and I’m miserable for a while, then the fleeting happiness returns. On the plus side, mother and I are getting along better. But, that too, is fleeting.

I can’t even put into words what’s going through my head right now.

Jul
29

Fun fun with a side of depression!

Ackk… my uncle doesn’t arrive soon enough. As soon as he arrives my mom, my brother, my cousin, Georgito, he, and I are gonna do some stuffs. :D Yey!! I can’t wait. Ooh! the doorbell just rang. Erm, I guess, to wrap things up, sadness keep creeping up on me. I’m officially a teenager. Oh em gee!! c[: ANYway, I have serious issues in letting goooo. I mean, if I still miss Mr. Perfect then you know something is wrong with me. It’s been a year since I’ve even seen Mr. Perfect and I still think about him. -smacks myself hard- There we go. (: Buh-bye thooooughts.

short and sweet. that’s me.

Edit We rented movies; we got The Notebook (which I had not seen!!), Racing Stripes, and The Aviator (which I saw at the movies but my mom hadn’t seen it). Racing Stripes was soooo funny. I recognized almost every single voice. I’m gooood (or just a movie geek). ;D Lols. I loved The Aviator all over again. My mom thought it was like a longer version of A Beautiful Mind. My aunts that saw the movie got bored. My mom just saw their P.O.V. but she liked it! She realized that it was a more passive movie than we’re used to. There was no big explosion for an ending. xD

And er… I didn’t like The Notebook. Don’t kill me! I just find it hard to believe that they loved each other. Throughout the whole movie they were just kissing. Eww. The only thing that made me not hate it were when they were old; that seemed like love to me! © The only other scene that even came close to pulling my heartstrings was the part where they were outside the white house and arguing and Noah says that they argue – it’s what they do – and that it’ll be hard and they’ll have to work at it everyday. Aww that was so sweet because in real life people do argue. It isn’t going to be one passionate love affair for the rest of your life ya know? My auntie El answered that at the beginning they were so passionate because it was a summer love and they only had so much time, when I asked why all they did was kiss. I simply didn’t believe the actors when they told each other they loved each other.

As a matter of fact, I no longer believe in love. When someone that isn’t in your family says, “I love you,” I will no longer believe it. It’s too hard to believe. Instead of seeing the love that Noah and Allie had, all I saw was her betrayal to him when she almost married that other guy, and then her betrayal to the latter when she went back to Noah while engaged. That’s all I saw. When I watch romantic movies nowadays, all I see are the betrayals and the hurts. I picture myself being like the betrayed and it isn’t pretty. Sure they were trying to get back together, but Allie hurt too many people in the process. -shrugs-

So much for short entries.

Jul
28

Underlying Dream

“I can’t pretend a stranger is a long-awaited friend.”

Hahah I feel beyond silly quoting that. He said that to me once. It’s rather melancholy to know that that never changed.

“So come on, tell me what you wanna do; I can’t wait around for you.”

Loud and clear, yes? Goodbye, Eric.

Jul
23

Randomosity

Can’t recall when it was . . . maybe last night or the night before that, but I dreamt that I was at a new school (it was sort of like Audubon, but not), and Daniel was there. Gahhh!! Why did I dream of him? It’s been so long since I’ve even seen him! I can’t imagine why I’d still like the guy. But there he was and I was trying my bestest to get him to notice me but he didn’t even like me in my dream. What a terrible dream it was!! Even in my dreams, Daniel won’t like me. Haha . . . so sad. I do wonder why he described someone an awful lot like me when asked whom he liked. I can wonder forever and ever why things went so horribly wrong.

I called Ryan todayy; I called a few days ago, but he was too slow in answering the phone. I left a message and said I would call back. Er–well I wanted to wait until the weekend to call. He asked why it took me so long to call him back. Haha what a soft guy. c[; I swear his voice seemed so different. Then again it has been so long since I last spoke with him that I may have forgotten what his voice sounded like. Ehh . . . I'm such a sucker for guys' voices; I love them. And on the phone you focus on listening to their voice; I instantly melt. [;

I'm going to the circus tomorrow with my uncle George and his son, Georgito. © I don't recall ever going to a circus . . .

Layout Info

I love the simplicity of this layout! I still am not happy with the arrangement of the layout, but what to do, eh? [: I took this picture myself while on a tour of Catalina Island. After so obviously flipping the picture, I added a few touches here and there and now you have the layout before you! It is version thirty two . . . wow; so many layouts. Layout production was slower back in my early blogging days, but I make sure to continually update them. [: At least the next two layouts will also be of pictures that I have taken and edited slightly. Ooh is this a trend to watch out for? Hehe. Anyway, continuing, the original image was nothing extraordinary at all; I really spiffy-ed it up. ;] lol. And, like I said, I don’t think this arrangement does it much justice. I considered putting clouds at the bottom of the table. ya know, the clouds usually being here at the top, but then I realized that not many people would scroll all the way to the bottom anyway. -sigh- I added borders and the gradient bg for some added style but something is miiiissing. hahah.

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