Tag: music

Cinnamon

February 26, 2009 by Brigitte

Note to self: Make blog post for Elizabeth regarding morality and beliefs.

Lolol… so the title comes from one of Rona’s slip-ups. Since she makes fun of me all the time when I say something not to her liking (video, wolf, etc.) I decided to laugh about it. She makes me happy~~ :D

I’m currently supposed to write a rough-draft of an original argument. The problem is that the essay’s topic is on ME. Ugh. I cannot write three pages on one of my personal traits, and demonstrate why that characterizes me. Three pages is too much. Blah. So to make it interesting, since we need two outside sources, I’m thinking of describing how  I’m happy using Aristotle’s definition of happiness. Lol… if I can make it about philosophy I will! Otherwise ugh… this is not an assignment I’m looking forward to writing. Tyler provided us with an article so we could use that and pick between being like Athenians or Visigoths… and so far I’ve always opted for the choice of picking some outside article to write my essays. Not this time though. I prefer writing analyses or critiques not original arguments.

This thing is due at midnight… alkfjlsfjlsjdf. What the hell. =\ At least I currently have a 99% in the class, though. *shrugs* Writing in stream-of-consciousness for about 10 minutes sometimes helps to get the writing process kick-started. I don’t really believe that, but I haven’t really been blogging so there ya go.

To keep myself happy I’ve been singing along to the Repo! soundtrack. Hahaha… but it’s sort of distracting, too.

Oh yeahhh… this is just a rough draft! I need to remember that. Though I do always write the entirety of my essay the first go-round so that for the final I just edit. Writing 2 sucks! I hate that UCSB doesn’t let you test out of it.

This weekend ought to be pretty fun, though, with me turning 20 and all that! :D Okkk, back to writing ze essay~!!

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Who let, you let this feeling die when all I did was try.

October 10, 2008 by Brigitte

The ever-lovely Lindsey is at a Bayside concert tonight in Minneapolis! What a lucky girl~ She really doesn’t mind traveling to go see bands play. Unfortunately I don’t have that luxury. They’re playing in Pomona and West Hollywood on Oct 22nd and 23rd, respectively, but that’s Wednesday and Thursday in two weeks. I have class everyday and I can’t afford to miss a single day. And in fact I’m already missing a day of school next week Friday. *sigh*

Oh to be free and attend concerts to my heart’s content.

Anyway, next weekend I’m going to Vegas (oh, again you say?)… Nena is finally getting married! I can’t exactly remember where the wedding will be or what hotel we’re staying at because (ugh!) my invitation went to my mom’s house – yeah, as if I live there? And I didn’t even know about it until recently and they were asking me if I was going to go and I was like, “Whaaat…?” all clueless-like. Yeah, ‘cus my mother didn’t even tell me. Geez.

Rony and I are getting along pretty well these days. Good stuff.

Now I’m just having problems with another friend. Ugh I swear to fuckin’ god all she does is either shit-talk people or talk about her really annoying drama. She owed me money for the *longest* time and finally I reminded her (because I’m a poor college student and I need my fucking money back asdf) and so I go upstairs to her apartment and the damn moment I walk in I can’t get a word in because she’s a non-stop shit-talking chatterbox. She shit talks David and Hailey behind their back. I can’t stand it!!! For sure it makes me wonder wtf she says about me! And I DEFEND both Hailey and David because they’re not present when she does her shit-talking, and I tell her straight out that’s what I’m doing for that very reason. Seriously, I don’t give a fuck if the guy you were sleeping with over the summer got another girlfriend without telling you because you didn’t even like him. ASDklhfalsSLFsdkfahsfJKSFKjsfsdf5458s4dfasdfjsadfh. That is all on the topic. (:

I am calm.

So I just listened to Bayside’s first three albums and fell in love all over again. Now I’m listening to their newest and fourth album and I’m a little “hmmm…” right now. Maybe it’s because I don’t know the lyrics or anything but they have strayed so far from the kind of music they used to make it’s a little annoying ngl. Then again I didn’t like The Walking Wounded *too* much at first and now I love it. Who knows, but I’m on the fourth song and nothing is to my liking yet. *grumbles*

Ooh tonight I’m celebrating @frenchtoastn‘s birthday! She turned 21 on Tuesday. (: I got her a cake and everything~ It’s really cute. ^^; We met at the Artshole house on Trigo this past weekend. She’s so nice and cute! Lol, I thought she was going to be tall but hehehe I think she’s my height. Short people unite? XD Hahaha…

Oh man, I haven’t really been talking to Elizabeth at all lately… since school started, I think. だめ　だめ。 Eek! Need to keep up with my bestie fo’ sho. ):

My goal this weekend: Finish a book. Dunno if I’ll be able to or not but I have to get on it!!! Hehe.

The third week of school is starting and I haven’t hung out with David once. I know he’s busy with voter registration all of fall quarter but blah… he traded his friends for a higher cause. Lol… XD; Aww well anyway I’m proud of all he’s doing and I know he can beat Christine’s record. He is rather enthusiastic. Hah.

Gaunt emotions. My feelings are dying.

Rony’s been inquiring and prying into my personal life lately. No, I didn’t give her any details, but it was enough to get me to thinking, remembering, questioning and… I don’t like it.

On the bright side we did discuss my personal beliefs in terms of ‘religion’ and ethical views. It started because she was celebrating that Jewish holiday in which you can’t do anything (no drinking water, eating, going anywhere, using electricity) for 24 hours to meditate and repent for your past mistakes. Definitely I did not agree with her holiday and so we discussed it for a good hour if not more. ^^: In summary I’ve divulged my rule for living along with it’s two requisites and how I believe in Utilitarianism and the Harm Principle.

I can’t go on. The thoughts are many, the time is few. ♥

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You Will Not Die…

October 6, 2008 by Brigitte

Listening to Blessthefall is pretty great, especially when it’s so loud you know the neighbors can hear it and even better right after you’ve just finished playing artists like TLC, Coolio, R. Kelly, and Michael Jackson. What can I say? I like me some vaaaried genres of music!

Keeping up with reading for classes really isn’t that bad! It’s all about pacing yourself and really getting down to it every day, without exception (uh except Friday and Saturday are my school-work-free days; that’s my law). All my classes are going very well so far. There are some times with I sort of trip out thinking, “Oh which of these classes am I going to fail? Probably Health Psych, or hmm… nah probabaly Stats.” But then! I read the textbook and it’s so easy to read… and I do my stats homework and I remember how well I did in it in high-school that I tell myself it’s *not* a big deal and then I sincerely believe it. Take it a day at a time!

Never thought I’d say this but Philosophy of Mind is going too slow! I’m so eager to learn more that I want the professor to keep giving us material and really I could sit there for a few hours… because one hour is not enough! Seriously… and I thought I had it bad for Phill 100A which was upper-division Ethics. Hehe… ^^;

Wow this weekend I spent more money than I should have… but oh well… I’m happy with everything I got! Tadadadada lalala lalala… *humming* This song is washing some serious serenity over my body. Hah, that sounds all hippie-ish… ^^;

Next song, next emotion. They’re all so transient. From yesterday.

Here’s to some kind of rebirth.

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Birthdays Galore!

September 15, 2008 by Brigitte

Aunt Elvia – August 25
Uncle Brian – August 29
Mom – September 11
Uncle George – September 16
Twin Aunts – September 25

It’s been a pretty exciting/hectic/expensive time o’ the year. We’ve been going out to dinner a lot lately. But good stuff. (: Geez, I love my family so much. They’re so amazingly funny! I love it~

Saturday night I went to a Nightwish concert. ZOMGZ. Epic epic epic! And what do you know? Sonata Arctica opened. Freaking aaaamazing! But I definitely miss Tarja. ): New vocalist girly can’t go as high as Tarja could, and her voice is a little bit more pitchy. Blah and they didn’t perform Planet Hell or Nemo, but they still played a ton of great songs~!! (: Loved it so much. Rona and I went together. YAYYY.

Sunday we went to the LA County Fair!! AHHH Mom and I got on this bungee jumping-like ride. Lmao, you had to sign this waiver if in case anything happens to you and ugh the ride was $25 per person. Like forreal. But anyway, it was so much fun!! And they have a microphone on the ride so people down below can hear you screaming. Everyone said something funny so I had to, too. I yelled out, “I love you Jesus!” pretending to be all fuhreaking scared. People laughed. (: Goal accomplished. And they also record you! Hahaha… we got the DVD. It’s pretty hilarious.

There was also a concert there… Jaguares. Spanish rock. It was aites. There were *so* many people… it was a bit overwhelming! And everyone was so loud and way into it. I had fun, though!

UGH… I’m watching the news right now. =\ Stocks plummeted today. DOW down by 500 points! The stocks went down so badly… it hasn’t gone down as badly since 9/11. An international bank went bankrupt today! I feel honestly sad for my country’s economy. Thousands of those bank employees have lost their jobs, too. It’s so awful how from one day to the other things changed so badly. Merrill Lynch though merged with Bank of America though so that bank is safe.

Imagine whoever had huge investments into Lehmann… they’re now bankrupt, too. All your stocks, and all the money invested – gone. Their stock is worth 21 cents now… =\

I wish I knew more about business and financial matters. I want to be a worldly person, whatever that means… There is life outside my day to day insignificant life. And I want the bigger picture. Some times I want to get involved in politics, too. Ah, dream big. But the problem with that is that I’d feel I’m not making a big impact.

There’s change and impact in helping a person at a time, too. A helping profession. That’s my future.

Lalala. AHHHH I love my family. And I can’t wait for the school year to start again! (: Hahaha I say this now, but once the year starts I’m going to be stressed and so over it. Haha.

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Nobody’s Here With You

September 13, 2008 by Brigitte

A little admittance of emotion.

But first I need to ask myself a question: WHY does Circa’s Your Friends Are Gone make me cry every single mother fuckin’ time it plays? The song was nearly over and I was just staring into space, seemingly unaffected… but then he started singing, “And you were barely holding on…” and the tears start falling down just like that. Sometimes I break into really hard sobbing, sometimes I’ll get teary-eyed, or like now, just plain ol’ crying.

When I cry (as the song plays) I’m not at all thinking about fall quarter of my first year of college at all, even though the song totally matches what happened during those really hard times. Thinking back, it makes me angry. And I want to hate David and Sandy so badly. Why am I friends with them now? When I needed them so much I didn’t have them there to support me.

Omgomg, I’m listening to my crying playlist aren’t I? I stopped crying, but next song and I’m crying again. The SONGS make me cry just because they sound so sad/have sad lyrics, but they’re not in any way connected with the thoughts in my head. Idgi. :/

Alright let me get right to the point of this entry. Uhh… hm, now it’s awkward. After crying I always have no emotions left. Lmao. WTH. I feel like dancing now… It’s like my heart freezes over and I can feel the cruelty inside me growing. That’s a strange feeling, but I can just SENSE my cruelty.

It’s really hard watching two people be happy… but only when you really like one of them. I just have to accept that they have something that I’ll never have with that person. How can their relationship have started off the same as mine and ended up better than mine? Some people are meant to be together, I guess.

You tried to help me, but I have to drown.

And another thing – one of my friends is stealing my personality. *sigh* She says she likes feeling small, and she’s starting to act all extra cutesy. I was doing something and she got a text from the guy she’s dating. He asked her what she was doing and she texted him what I was doing because it was cute…

Stop making such a fuss. You might think I’m cutesy, but I’m still the one all alone. (OH GROSS. Totally admitting some emotions. It’s making me nauseous forserious.)

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